Today I will be explaining how to make a cocktail of my own creation which I’ve called Dandy Cocktail #2.
But first, a bit of context: Cocktail nomenclature relies on numerology to express when a variation has been made. In this case, the Dandy Cocktail #2 is a variation on a classic Dandy Cocktail which is itself a variation on a Manhattan which as we know has many other variations. It is generally accepted that the better the Mixologist, the higher the frequency with which he or she references or uses the word “variation” in their craft. Further, a Dandy as defined by the esteemed organization Urbandictionary.com, is a “man who considers himself to be an arbiter of culture and refinement and wit”. This of course is the aesthetic ideal upon which serious modern Mixologists model themselves. It goes without saying of course that the best cocktails are crafted with only the rarest, most esoteric and hardest to pronounce spirits and ingredients. I’ve applied this essential idea to my reworking of the original cocktail mentioned above.
Ice is of utmost importance and should be given due thought. My thoughts on ice begin with my morning coffee as I prepare myself mentally to make my evening cocktails.
The day is spent harvesting the necessary ingredients
Bourbon Whiskey- the best was of course distilled during the California Gold Rush of 1849. Your local liquor merchant will no doubt have a bottle.
Bitters- While it goes without saying that I make my own using herbs grown on a rooftop in Brooklyn, if you must purchase them the highest in quality are made from rare plants harvested from the jungle floor of the Amazon. Or Angostura. Whichever you prefer.
Distillate of Unicorn Tears- easily sourced from your local spice shop. One can easily substitute the Tears of a Buddhist but the effect is not quite as desired.
Amaro- While the ingredient isn’t actually in the cocktail it is necessary to have a bottle next to you as you mix the other ingredients. Otherwise it’s not mixology and you’ve wasted your time and mine.
Green Chartreuse- This is a very serious cocktail and every serious cocktail conceived in the last 5 years has incorporated Green Chartreuse.
Can of Pabst Blue Ribbon- or other cheap beer endorsed by the population of Williamsburg, Brooklyn.
Mixology can be quite rigorous. It’s important to be limber of body and mind for optimum execution. Before I approach the bar I do five or seven Sun Salutations in preparation.
Ensure you have proper glassware. My personal favorites are made by a shamanistic glassblower based out of Tesuque. His pieces can be purchased online here and should be chilled- liquid nitrogen being the obvious choice for this task.
Pour yourself a shot of Chartreuse Green. I use a shot glass with Santa on it I stole from a Christmas themed Tiki bar after too many shots of pineapple rum. Take the shot and lightly blow into the glass to aromatize.
In a crystal mixing glass, use any spoon that is at least 24 inches long in handle to stir the remaining ingredients with ice. Pour this first cocktail in the sink. You now have properly seasoned tools. Repeat the above step but instead strain the cocktail through cheesecloth into the cocktail glass.
Garnish with your favorite edible flower. If time allows, I sometimes enjoy etching a portrait of Jerry Thomas onto the surface of an orange peel for garnish.
Arrange the cocktail on your home bar with various tools and photograph it for Instagram. The Amaro filter is preferred for obvious reasons.
Crack your PBR and drink it while staring contemplatively at the cocktail you’ve just created and compulsively check for social media “likes”.
Discard the cocktail as you drain the rest of your beer. For serious Mixologists, cocktails are more of a metaphysical thought experiment than a beverage so drinking an actual cocktail is not necessary. Beer, wine and whiskey, neat, are preferred.